A broad life

We are in a sort of dream-state here. Though we know in our heads that we will be returning to the states soon, there is so much unfinished business that it does not quite seem real. I imagine it won't seem real until we board the plane. It is a funny feeling to get on a plane, travel thousands of miles, then call a new place 'home'. Though we're not 'from' here (not even way back in our family trees) the Netherlands has been home for four years. Speaking for myself (Mike is busy painting the bathroom, so I will do him the favor of leaving him alone while I write this)-- the Netherlands has felt like home during our time here. Even on our visits to the states I felt I was away from home, and that Enschede was 'home' for me. Though I inexplicably cried suddenly, appropo of nothing twice when we visited Charleston last: when I went to see my friend Jen, and when I was standing in Mark McConnel's office (the coordinator of the MES program at CofC). I'd spent so much time in both those places, and I guess I felt I had missed something by being far away from them.

But now this is home, not only because most of my shoes are here-- but because we have lived SO MUCH here. For only four years it has been full of intense experiences. Struggling to make sense of a new culture, making new friends in a totally new place, pregnancies, births, dissertation, general work-related soul-searching... and that doesn't even touch on the 'living in an unfinished caravan' experience, or the insane idea of renovating not one but two places in three years. Or that both of our boys were born not just on this soil, but in this very house.

We laugh about how we spend a little too much time here together as a couple. In general, in our past lives, we each enjoyed independent activities and lots of time both together and apart. Here we are almost always together-- whether its due to the lack of a car, the focused social interactions, or the circumstances of very young children with very specific napping schedules. Our life in the Netherlands is slow-- quiet, focused and intense-- understand, the Netherlands is not necessarily slow, but we are slow here. Maybe its just not having a car-- simple energy, time, and distance constraints keep us from rushing- rushing- rushing too much. We both feel fortunate to have so much time here. We both have flexible working schedules, so much so that we each take a portion of the day to take care of the kid(s), and a portion for working. We take a family walk together nearly every day. We talk about every nuance of our days to each other. I just don't imagine life in Charleston will be like that. It couldn't be.
It is exciting to think about being around so many friends in Charleston, being close to family again, and both being busy with full time work. My job will still be flexible, but Mike is likely to be heading into a more 9 to 5 sort of scenario. I am already anticipating what this will mean for us as a family. We all agree a broadening of perspective is long overdue, and it is exciting to think about making a transition from this intense family life in the Netherlands, to a more expansive life in Charleston.